The lyrics of the song make me cry but I blame you for the tears.
I wasted all my time telling you goodbye
I could have conversed better with this wine.
The lights shimmer brighter now that you’re gone.
Your shadow covered all the beauty around.
You lied and said the sun was just going down
But it was you all along
Standing in the doorway blocking the rays
Those good ol rays, so warming to the soul
You made me go cold
But now that you’re gone I cry while basking in the sunshine
As lonely as I am, I was lonelier with you around.
It’s harder than I thought it would be but I’m stronger now because it’s just me.
I loved you good for a while
But you just made me cry real good
Now, I can’t stand,
No, I really can’t stand
That I let you
Lie.
The hardest thing I’ve had to learn and except is that, for the time being, I’m better off alone. That there is no man on this earth that can love me the way that God does. I tried for so long to substitute God’s love with human love. Earthly love is tangible. You can see it and touch it. Human love is a cuddle, a kiss, an audible “I love you”. It’s flowers and handholding and passion. It’s also fragile, and you can lose it in the blink of an eye.
True love is God given. However, more often than not, what we think to be “true love” is a convincing lie and a fleeting emotion. It sickens me to think I’ve fallen for that lie.
For the life of me I cannot figure out why I chose to ignore Psalm 146:3.
“Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal man who cannot save.”
Why, oh why did I have to get my heart broken so many times to learn such a valuable lesson?
I went about this lesson the hard way and have been left a little jaded and bitter towards the male race (my sweet boys excluded). I just wished I had learned early on that God could be my everything.
Both of my sisters figured it out. If you haven’t read my sister Heather’s blog, you should. Heatherlaynelamb.blogspot.com. She has her love story blogged and right smack dab in the center of that human love story is her love story with God. She depended on Him solely when boy after boy left her jaded. God rewarded her dependence on Him and brought her an amazing man, Mr. Hunter Lamb, who ALSO depended solely on God. Although there are times that they lean on each other, as every married couple should, they never lose sight of the One who got them where they are. God is their glue.
I didn’t have that glue. In fact, I’m still struggling to coat myself in that “glue”. I don’t know if God will ever bless me with what both of my sisters have but I do know that IF He does, I want to be ready.
Jim Caveizel spoke at my church a couple Sunday’s ago. You may know him as Jesus, in “The Passion of the Christ”. He has an amazing testimony but one thing he said really stuck out to me.
“A true knight does not wear shining armor. Their armor is dented and dull and blood stained and they rescue their fair maidens.”
He was talking about men being Godly men. Men who stand up and stand with their families. Men who keep their eye on the Lord and fight the world around them that is tempting to bring them down.
Ladies, we also need to learn what a fair maiden is. We need to be worthy of our knight’s fight! We need tend to the men that God has placed in our lives. We also have to fight the world around us.
I failed to do that.
God and God alone is the one who will drive us through the fight.
This time alone is one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I have faith it is going to be one of the most rewarding. My eyes and my heart have already been opened to so many truths in such a short amount of time. I was constantly using some sort of relationship, romantic or even just a friendship, to distract me from the things I needed to focus on. I finally think God has me just where He wants me. I’m ready to listen. I’m ready to learn. I’m ready to be coated in glue.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Cookies and Candies and Cake
When did the food pyramid become separated into two categories? Adult and children. Did I miss the email? Not only that, while the adult pyramid remains the same, the children’s pyramid looks similar to this:
It makes me sad. When did kids get so picky? Let me rephrase that, when did parents allow kids to be so picky? Kids have always been “Ew gross, I don’t wanna, you can’t make me, I’m hungry” little people. Parents have chosen to allow kids to be pacified with whatever they point their chubby little fingers and grunt at.
I’m not the perfect parent and just as guilty as the next mom standing in the McDonalds line while her kid throws a fit on the nasty tiled floor because they got the blue car and not the green one. I can still be sad though. Sad that I gave into the hype and that all it takes is big pleading eyes, a crusty nose and the pronunciation of “L” as “Y” to get me to cave and feed my blonde angels dinosaur shaped, processed chicken meat…ish.
I WILL pat myself on the back for the fact that I never make my kids a “special” meal at dinner. They sit their little back talking fannies down and eat what I put on their plate or they go to bed hungry. It has worked wonders and I can proudly say persistence had paid off. My oldest son asked for peas instead of fries on a family outing once. It was the proudest moment of my parenting life. I just wonder why more parents aren’t doing something similar.
Walking into my boy’s elementary school sometimes knocks the breath out of me. When I was in school, there was one, maybe two over weight kids. Now…oh man.
It infuriates me! However, at the same time, I don’t know the kids, I don’t know the parents, I don’t know the situation. I just find it odd how many of them there are. Coincidence? Most likely not. Heartbreaking? Absolutely! It feels like we are giving our children a jump-start on adult obesity and coronary heart disease (the leading cause of death for men and women in America).
“Remember Junior, if your heart starts to beat really fast and your chest hurts, its probably all those chicken nuggets catching up to you. I apologize in advance baby, you were just so darn cute I couldn’t say no!”
According to www.cdc.gov “Childhood obesity has more than tripled in the past 30 years. The prevalence of obesity among children aged 6 to 11 years increased from 6.5% in 1980 to 19.6% in 2008. The prevalence of obesity among adolescents aged 12 to 19 years increased from 5.0% to 18.1%.”
WOW!
I think the problem is time. It has become such a precious commodity to everyone. Most food is coated in sodium, preserved and pre packaged for convenience now days. Just add water and microwave. Zap the nutrients and clog your little munchkins arteries all in less than 5 minutes! Whoot Whoot! Who’s jumping on that train? 90% of America, that’s who.
Proverbs 13:24 says this “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.”
I’d like to think this could be taken several different ways. Discipline is not just classified as hauling off and smacking the rear end of your impish little elf. Discipline is training friends! Training your children to behave, to be kind, to EAT RIGHT! Discipline IS love.
Showing your children love is not giving your child a king sized Snickers bar because they only screamed for 20 minutes rather than 30 at the doctors office. Love is a shiny sticker and maybe a fist bump (my boys respond well to those) and a “Hey bud you did awesome in there!”
Too many parents are equating love with rewards. Sadly, rewards can become indulgence. When those rewards are food, which seems to be the reward of choice among several brat breeders, the end result is not too pretty. Food+Indulgence= “What is your five year old teetering on? 180?”
Of course that is an extreme, but sadly, all too common case.
All in all fellow and future parents, what we need to decide is this: Do we love our children more than convenience? Do we love them enough to say “NO”?
I, for one, would like my children to out live me. I’m thinking grilled chicken and broccoli is sounding perfect for dinner tonight!
Candy
Colorful multi-vitamin
Chicken nuggets and hotdogs
Grilled cheese, mac and cheese, cream of cheese
Peanut butter and jelly, goldfish crackers, pizza, french fries
Candy when you tinkle, candy when you cry, and candy when you smile
Juice, soda, juice, soda, juice, soda, juice, soda, juice, soda, juice, water, milk
I’m not the perfect parent and just as guilty as the next mom standing in the McDonalds line while her kid throws a fit on the nasty tiled floor because they got the blue car and not the green one. I can still be sad though. Sad that I gave into the hype and that all it takes is big pleading eyes, a crusty nose and the pronunciation of “L” as “Y” to get me to cave and feed my blonde angels dinosaur shaped, processed chicken meat…ish.
I WILL pat myself on the back for the fact that I never make my kids a “special” meal at dinner. They sit their little back talking fannies down and eat what I put on their plate or they go to bed hungry. It has worked wonders and I can proudly say persistence had paid off. My oldest son asked for peas instead of fries on a family outing once. It was the proudest moment of my parenting life. I just wonder why more parents aren’t doing something similar.
Walking into my boy’s elementary school sometimes knocks the breath out of me. When I was in school, there was one, maybe two over weight kids. Now…oh man.
It infuriates me! However, at the same time, I don’t know the kids, I don’t know the parents, I don’t know the situation. I just find it odd how many of them there are. Coincidence? Most likely not. Heartbreaking? Absolutely! It feels like we are giving our children a jump-start on adult obesity and coronary heart disease (the leading cause of death for men and women in America).
“Remember Junior, if your heart starts to beat really fast and your chest hurts, its probably all those chicken nuggets catching up to you. I apologize in advance baby, you were just so darn cute I couldn’t say no!”
 |
| Not cute. |
According to www.cdc.gov “Childhood obesity has more than tripled in the past 30 years. The prevalence of obesity among children aged 6 to 11 years increased from 6.5% in 1980 to 19.6% in 2008. The prevalence of obesity among adolescents aged 12 to 19 years increased from 5.0% to 18.1%.”
WOW!
I think the problem is time. It has become such a precious commodity to everyone. Most food is coated in sodium, preserved and pre packaged for convenience now days. Just add water and microwave. Zap the nutrients and clog your little munchkins arteries all in less than 5 minutes! Whoot Whoot! Who’s jumping on that train? 90% of America, that’s who.
Proverbs 13:24 says this “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.”
I’d like to think this could be taken several different ways. Discipline is not just classified as hauling off and smacking the rear end of your impish little elf. Discipline is training friends! Training your children to behave, to be kind, to EAT RIGHT! Discipline IS love.
Showing your children love is not giving your child a king sized Snickers bar because they only screamed for 20 minutes rather than 30 at the doctors office. Love is a shiny sticker and maybe a fist bump (my boys respond well to those) and a “Hey bud you did awesome in there!”
Too many parents are equating love with rewards. Sadly, rewards can become indulgence. When those rewards are food, which seems to be the reward of choice among several brat breeders, the end result is not too pretty. Food+Indulgence= “What is your five year old teetering on? 180?”
Of course that is an extreme, but sadly, all too common case.
All in all fellow and future parents, what we need to decide is this: Do we love our children more than convenience? Do we love them enough to say “NO”?
I, for one, would like my children to out live me. I’m thinking grilled chicken and broccoli is sounding perfect for dinner tonight!
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